Floodgates to memories ...

I know I don't miss you. I miss how i felt
being with you. I miss how you made me feel
when I was with you! 

Day VII

Dear you!

Today is going to be a particularly difficult day for me.  So many memories come flooding in, all at once. Today, I suddenly feel that there is so much more to say and so much more to feel but a vague distant of denseness covers me and I cannot but see the other side. Today I miss you! I woke up in the morning thinking about you, about how your hands wrapped around my waist felt like and in savoring that sweetness I unconsciously opened the flood gates to memories. The anxious every bit of memory of you, and of us came rushing in with a force unbearable to the heart, drenching every ounce of my bitter soul.

The floodgates to memories have opened and the memory wave lashes me from within …

The wind is the same, blows right through me like I am translucently invisible. The bright orange sky from the first ray of light is a lot more charming after yesterday’s storm. The clouds look a lot prettier hanging in the thin air creating a sense of white-awe. If only stars were visible, it was a perfect picturesque image. Everything was in sync with each other. The subtle stillness of wee hours of morning to the rhythmic motion of chirps to the dynamic yet delicate motion of the transition from night to day – everything was in perfect sync with each other enveloping the ironies of nature.

Everything was in sync … but me! You aren't there, how can I be in sync? I am incomplete … 

~Lavender Meadow~